caps lock is cruise control for cool

I'm joining the club of 'my title doesn't reflect anything to do with my actual blog'.

I hate school sometimes, but also, I'm scared of what's going to happen when it's over. The further along my school I go, the more I worry.
I have aspirations, and I have hopes, but sometimes it feels like i've only just woken up from a dream.
My facebook states "My life is a tentative thesis", which is partially because 'tentative thesis's' are so important to History majors, but also because I become diffident whenever I think about my life, where it could end up and how it could go about getting there.

Recently I added something about how I can never properly convey the words that gurgle around inside my head into any meaningful.
This is something I guess i've struggled with for my whole life, and it is probably painfully obvious via my blog. I feel like, inside my head, I have all these awesome things to say, but I can't ever express it correctly.
So I try to be a writer, but I can't write what I think in a way I'm happy with, the same goes for poetry. I've always dabbled in poetry, but I can't say i've ever felt satisfied with it. Which isn't to say it doesn't edify me, per se, because I really enjoy writing and poetry, and I often get great satisfaction after writing something I approve of, maybe I'm just hard to please.
Or actually, I think its that I am awfully self-critical, and I rarely feel like I am or should be satisfied with myself.

anyways, now that I've fully expressed my lamentations... I have little else to say.
Which is good because it fits into my goal of sticking to one or two topics per blog.